SHORT STORIES Index Page 9

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In the garage sale of the mind, the one-eyed man is king. There’s a trick surviving the simple pleasures in life: if I only knew what it was. When battling the lawn of doom, more power doesn't always cut it When planning breakfast do not go via the town dump Circles in the sand just a home away from home. Everything new isn’t what it used to be. The trouble with time machines is they can go both ways Another scraping of the brie Welcome to the year of the bees After a lifetime of chasing fitness, how come I'm overweight and out of breath I know nothing of the man at the side of the road The monster on my ear called the cell-phone Welcome to the year of the bees The trouble with being a middle-aged delinquent. After many winters of evolution, frontier life has no appeal When life runs like clockwork it's time to worry A journey to Christmas shopping’s heart of darkness Want to spread some peace and joy? Then stay home this Christmas.  I would offer an apology if I could only remember whom I insulted Psst, want to know what a man really wanted for Christmas?  Life changing moments can sometimes start with a smack in the mouth Enjoy the present before your future is behind you All the colors become grays when it’s time to take down the ornaments Barely surviving the winds of winter Tell me what our children’s world will be like The cars of our past as a history of our lives A history of the computer according to me. Part I A history of the computer according to me. Part 2 Enjoying a walk down heaven’s beach Wandering into the land of the "X" chromosome A little bit of history from a lost soul Living in the land of dogs and boats Beware of cats and planets The green monster lives and I am not talking about baseball Yearning for the Drive-ins of our Past  Genetic Traits of wallets and handbags Attack of the horned heathens from hell I know why the dinosaurs went extinct: They stopped believing. There are certain things one shouldn't do at 56 years Rights for Ice-cream Just because you don't understand it doesn't mean it has to be wrong A Journey to the other side A day in the life..9/11 Generational memories simply don't mix Learning to let go of those favorite things Is there anyone else out there sick and tired of being afraid? The return of the prodigal daughter Memories of theaters gone by Where has all the snow fall gone? Even our flu's are faster today All I wanted was a little more energy 'Technology is us' whether we like it or not A fine line exists between courage and stupidity Sometimes it is good to make lemons out of lemonade If you don't try, you'll never know Looking into the eyes of our future I want to go back to a time Searching for that little bit of peace A moving society of strangers Data does not define who our children are A career defined by a stapler The necessity of distractions during the wild days of spring To the head of the table of life How long can one believe a changing reason for war? Keep them barefoot and terrorized Yearning for the Drive-ins of our Past Taking care of the furry parts of our lives Diary of a protestor as an old man Sometimes it is better not to do that great of a job People who were different define our towns Ya, ever wonder why? A place called Perkins Cove Time to end evangelical conservatism A history of the team according to me A robin in the sun Missing the times of our past by a young man A voyage into the den of Wal-Mart A recyclable kind of guy Reflections on a Christmas Past Old Man Caucusing Can we afford excuses? No technology can help those who are directionally challenged Going round and round in our circle game