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Copyrights reserved by the author. If you are in doubt, please click on 'Copyrights' and read the details. Christine's first day at the office by Paul Main. It was my first day at the office and Irene was showing me the ropes. She was demonstrating something on the computer when the telephone on my desk rang. "Go on, answer it," Irene said with a smile. I grabbed the phone, dropped it, then clamped it to my face. I couldn't hear a thing. I gave it a tap. "Christine, you're holding it upside down," said Irene grinning. "I'm sorry," I said, getting more and more frustrated, I tried turning it round and dropped it again, by now the caller had hung up. "Ooops Butterfingers." I said. After a while the boss, Mr Witty, came over and introduced himself. "Are you settling-in alright?" he asked. "Yes thank you," I said nervously. "Did you have to far to come to work"? He asked and before I knew it Mr. Witty and I were chatting like we'd known each other for years. I was desperate to come across as friendly, which is why I made my next slip. "Right then Christine, I'll leave you to get on then," he said. "Thanks Darling", I said. ' Darling.' What had I said? There was a stunned silence, Mr. Witty looked astonished and his jaw had dropped open. For the rest of the morning I kept my head down and tried to make sure my brain was in gear before opening my mouth. However I still ended up knocking things over and even hanging up on Mr Witty's wife when she rang to speak to him. Just before lunch Mr Witty made an announcement. "Lets all go to the pub to celebrate Christine's first day," he said. It was the ideal opportunity to get to know people, and for them to get to know me, rather than the buffoon they'd seen in action that morning. All was going well, until Jessica walked in. She was the woman who kept giving me dirty looks and tutting every time I made a mistake. As she'd been a bit frosty, I thought it was up to me to initiate a thaw. I noticed her bump. It was the perfect conversation starter. I said "So Jessica, when is the baby due?" There was another of those awkward silences. Jessica fixed me with a stare and said, "I'm not pregnant!" How was I supposed to know that she was just fat. "That's good," I said quickly. "At least you'll be able to have a drink." "I don't drink." She replied icily I gulped mine down and Mr Witty offered me another. I felt such a fool! I'd offended everyone and it was only my first day. I doubted that anyone would be speaking to me by the end of the week. Mr Witty chatted to me and I had another drink. It was making me feel better. I began to relax. No one except for Mr Witty was making any effort to include me in the conversation. He kept gazing at me with soft eyes and at that moment it seemed he was my only friend in the world. I took another sip of wine and leant over to him. " You know what, Mr Witty?" I slurred. "You're really lovely, you are." I planted my lips on his cheek and gave him a big sloppy kiss. I hiccupped, then I looked round at all the faces staring at me. Irene had a look of utter repugnance and Mr Witty was as red as a beetroot. "Perhaps it time we were getting back", he said. When we got back to the office, I caught glimpses of the others huddled together, whispering and looking in my direction, even Mr Witty was keeping his distance, I didn't blame him, fancy kissing the boss of all people! I'd made such a bad impression, but tomorrow, I vowed to myself, things were going to be different.
Next day I arrived at the office very sombrely. When others spoke to me I thought carefully about my reply before opening my mouth. Instead of going at things like a bull in a china shop, I thought things through and didn't slip up once. In fact, I was a model worker. I thought I was doing well until I noticed the others standing in the corner whispering. Then Mr Witty called me over for a quiet word, the huddle of people watched closely as I walked across to his desk. Oh dear, I thought now I'm for it. He was probably cross about the kiss I gave him. " Is everything OK, Christine?" "Yes," I murmured "Its just that you don't seem quite like yourself today." "Oh yes about yesterday", I said. "I really didn't mean to upset anyone---" "Don't worry about that," he said "everyone's worried they've upset you." "Erm, me?" "Well, you've been so quiet this morning", he said. "They preferred you the way you were." "Well, hopefully I won't be that bad again." "Don't be silly," said Mr Witty. Then the others came over. "It's going to be fun having you around," Irene said. "You gave us all a laugh yesterday, and we could do with some fun round here," Jessica said almost with a smile. My heart leapt. There I was thinking I'd blown my chances in my new job and all along the whole office had liked me. " I should have realised," I said, "you'd need a sense of humour to wear those shoes, Jessica." Jessica looked down at her spotted ocelot print shoes "Actually, my mother bought them for me," she said. There was another awful silence. I'd done it again! However, Jessica burst out laughing. "And she's got terrible taste", she said. The others joined in; even Irene managed a little grin. In fact, there were no more awkward silences after that.
The End
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